Dear Parents, Within weeks of my youngest son's high school enrollment last fall, I found myself addicted to a crack-like website called Veracross,  the high school's online gradebook.   Oh, yes. And you're absolutely right. I should've known better.   After all, we don't offer this access at Abintra because we firmly embrace independence and the necessity of failure in the formation of functioning, vibrant adolescents who will be equipped to take on the challenges of the world.   The philosophy of Abintra encourages parents and guides to never do for children what they can do for themselves, and to be comfortable with the process and the uncertainty of the journey, not focused on perfection or a prize.   Yet.   I found myself logging in daily. In the afternoon, my son was more likely to be greeted with a pointed inquiry about a missing math assignment as he climbed into the car instead of a simple hello. Dinner conversation